So much thought has been going into my fears for the future lately. I’ve been afraid of what I should do, and afraid of what I can do, and afraid of what I might mess up. I was looking for a sign, any sign, that might direct me to the right path. Unfortunately, a sign was’t what I needed. What I needed was an opportunity. That was also what I didn’t have. So I decided to make an opportunity of my own.
My passion is creativity, my dream is writing, but technically my field is education. Most of the time when people think about education they assume you are a teacher. However, teaching is not all that there is to education. There are many more things I can do with my time while still making use of my current education. As long as I am willing to make my own opportunities, and do things that might scare me a little.
There are many good things that come with making a decision for your future. I feel much calmer, focused, and sure of what is coming. Of course deciding on the next step does not guarantee I will not fall, but of course, not taking any steps is just standing around.
There is one downside. While working to pursue new opportunities, I may have to let some things go. Choosing what I want to let go is difficult; I am fortunate enough to have the ability to choose most of my activities right now. When you enjoy so much of what you do, why would you want to give anything up? Of course, I don’t. Instead, I decided to release a little pressure without giving anything up. I’m taking my timeline off of the 50 books challenge. Without the looming deadline, which I was frightened I was going to miss anyway, I don’t need to rush through my reading. Instead I can read the books at my leisure, and also have time to both pursue and create new opportunities. I will still be able to finish the list, but not by July 31.
It’s slightly frightening, making a decision, but also liberating. So, today I am liberated, and I am going to enjoy the freedom.